THE LONDON COMEDY COURSE train over 300 comics a year and use headline comics who play venues such as 'Jongleurs' as tutors.  5* rated for the past three years by

All courses are aimed at the beginner and range from 3 hour taster sessions to 6 week Monday evening courses with a showcase at the end.

Recent students have won numerous competitions including LOADED magazine  comic of the year.   Great thing to try for fun, for a hobby or as many of our students found a new source of income and career.

We are happy that THE LONDON COMEDY COURSE have been based in our venue for it's third year now.

See   for full info    PRICES FROM £45


 Fri 4th Sept  9pm to 2am



info at


In association with Samuel French and The South London Players TC

16th to 19th Sept 8pm


"Do you know what I mean Tone?" If those words send a shiver down your spine then you've probably encountered the monstrous Beverly before.

As hostess of the most excruciatingly uncomfortable soiree ever, the main character of Mike Leigh's  play, Abigail's Party has entered popular culture as the epitome of 1970s suburban boredom and snobbery.

Free cheese and pineapple sticks for everyone and the theatre bar will be removing some of its Chilean Merlot and restocking with 'Blue Nun' to bring back the flavour of the 70's.  

Tickets £15  (members £5 certain dates apply, please call if a member)

Box office 0208 694 1888 or book on line HERE


Tues 29th Sept to Sun 4th Oct 2015  8pm  (Sun 5pm)


In the exclusive social circles of 21st Century Chelsea, the lives and
loves of the affluent and respectable ruling elite are not all that
they seem; behind the glamorous veneer of SW1 lies an explosive social
scene plagued by lust, heartbreak and betrayal. Is heartbreaker Lord
Illingworth’s penitence to be trusted? How will party queens Allonby
and Stutfield react when New Yorker Hester Worsley steals the
attention? Will Mrs. Arbuthnot’s mysterious secret smash their
superficial world? Emotions and hairstyles run high in Venture Wolf’s
autumn production of Oscar Wilde’s rarely performed classic, A Woman
of No Importance.

Tickets can be bought from external agents only at

Tickets £13.20


7th - 9th Oct  7pm to 10pm

ACTING & CASTING COURSE FOR BEGINNERS  (total 3 sessions - 9 hours)

Did you know our training centre is a well known casting suite for theatre and film productions and used by many companies to find actors/performers each week

Did you know that a number of our  students with no previous acting skills have been cast in professional theatre, film and TV productions as they have been spotted by our casting director while in training. 

We have decided to do a special 3 evening intense course which not only will give you the skills to  act and do well at castings for both theatre and TV.

To book and more information click HERE 


15th to 17th Oct  8pm    £15


by Keith Waterhouse in association with Samuel French

Jeffrey Bernard is Unwell is a play about real-life journalist . Bernard was still alive at the time the play was first performed in the West End in 1989. Bernard wrote the "Low Life" column in The Spectator. The play's title refers to the magazine's habit of printing a one-line apology on a blank page when he was too drunk or hung-over to produce the required copy and a substitute article could not be found before the deadline for publication. Its premise is that Bernard has found himself locked in overnight at his favourite public house, the coach and Horses in Soho Jeffrey Bernard Is Unwell was a highly successful vehicle for its original star Peter O'Toole. The show opened in Brighton in September 1989, moved to Bath and made its triumphant London debut at the Apollo Theatre in Shaftesbury Avenue in October. O'Toole also appeared in a later revival at the Old Vic. The Old Vic run was totally sold out, and on 23 August 1999 the London Evening Standard published a 'Bluffer's Guide' to enable readers to pretend they had seen it: "thereby allowing dinner party conversations and watercooler debates to run their course unhindered by ignorance." O'Toole was followed in the part by Tom Conti who starred in a revival of the play until September 2006 at the Garrick Theatre in London. The part has also been played by James Bolam, Dennis Waterman,  and Robert Powell,  A cast of six bring this great modern  comedy classic to life. 

Box office 0208 694 1888 


The London Theatre touring event

Sat 31st Oct & Sun 1st Nov 10am to 4pm


Did you know our theatre also does a number of  external touring productions and large scale events around the UK each year?  Part of this is running three major model railway shows  in New Cross, Sevenoaks and Cobham.   These are large scale exhibitions, which saw over 900 people attending our last show in Sevenoaks over a 8 hour period.  Our next show is our New Cross show and is a great day out for the whole family!

The event is held at Hatcham St James School, opposite New Cross Gate BR and there is a aftershow Bottled Beer festival at our theatre from 4pm

Tickets from £4 if pre booked

16 fully scenic working train layouts from Z to O gauge

 Trade and model shop stands

2 x Train Simulators

Children's driving layout

Modelling demonstrations


See   for all info

You can also pre book at our box office on 0208 694 1888 or ONLINE


Thurs 5th to Sat 7th Nov  8pm

JOY DIVISION - the Nazi Sex Slaves Story

by Harry Denford

In the 70s and early 80s, the well-known Manchester band, Joy Division, took their name from events had nothing to do with joy. The name comes from forced labour camps in Nazi Germany. In these camps, thousands of young  Polish women were used as sex slaves for German officers before they went to fight on the Russian front. These young girls, known as 'Feld Hure' (Field Whores), underwent daily 'enjoyment duty' where three bad reports were met with brutal levels of punishment. The question is, in such dire circumstances, do humans take solace in the companionship of others suffering the same fate? Or does an individual's supposed submission give them greater dominance and a longer shelf life? Warning: Contains Female Nudity. 

This production has been seen in numerous theatres around the UK, performed and was performed in English or Polish and in 2014 was included in the Summer RADA festival in the West End.

Tickets £10.50   (members £5)  Box office 0208 694 1888

Over 18 only


 Tues 10th Nov to Sun 22th Nov 


Two weeks of new plays, dance, stand up comedy & live music and new shows each night


Sat 19th & Sunday 20th Dec   7.30pm  £10

KAPUSNIC performed in Russian

Directed by Larissa Turkina


'KAPUSNIC' or cabbage is a traditional Russian event where villagers used to go around, perform comedy sketches and comedy songs and eat cabbage. Russian stand up comedy forms the modern version of this without the cabbage eating. 

Back by popular demand with a whole new show of comedy and song and performed in Russian by a mixture of Russian comedy actors and staff members from the Russian National Tourist Office. 

Mad, funny and very silly (helps if you speak Russian).  Book fast as these events sell out fast.

Tickets £10   box office 0208 694 1888 


Tues 26th Jan - Sunday 31st Jan  8pm (Sun 5pm)  £12

SHOPPED by Ian Holloway

This fast-paced new comedy by long-time New Cross resident Ian Holloway is set in Liddi’s, a supermarket chain so low-rent it makes Aldi looks like Fortnum & Mason.

These are troubled times, with financial scandal looming for the Liddi’s group. Will the unscrupulous but charismatic CEO escape with his reputation (and knighthood) intact? What dark secret is the paraplegic manageress hiding? Will the artist-in-residence get what she so thoroughly deserves? And will Candy, the hapless shelf-stacker, win out against all the odds?

Why not come along and find out? Shake off the January blues with 2 hours of fun-filled theatre, as the cast plays everything from self-checkout machines to a pharmacist more spacey than Sir Kevin.

Box office 0208 694 1888